


Probably, Maybe, Definitely

by hhaeyeun



Category: Persona 5, Persona Universe - Fandom
Genre: Angst, Any and All relationships allowed, Crack, Did i say crack, Fluff, Mementos, P5 Headcanons, Palaces, Redemption (maybe), compilation fic, oneshots, soft
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-06
Updated: 2019-05-06
Packaged: 2020-02-27 07:25:11
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,938
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18734362
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hhaeyeun/pseuds/hhaeyeun
Summary: A collection of Phantom Thief fights, crack, fluff, probably angst, just a lot of oneshots honestly





	Probably, Maybe, Definitely

Akira learned a lot of things about his friends while robbing Palaces. 

_ Fact 1: The Thieves bring a stereo with them and backup party members turn on “Last Surprise” whenever they fight Shadows. _

Panther, Skull, and Mona jumped as Akira flicked on the stereo.

“What the eff--” Skyll started to protest, but Joker flashed him a stunning smirk and turned the volume up until it drowned out the rest of Skull’s sentence. Mona flattened his ears and tried to yell over the music.  _ “What are you doing, Jo--” _

_ “YOU’LL NEVER SEE IT COMING~” _ cut Mona’s hollering off as Joker leapt into the fray, pulling out his dagger and swiftly slashing the Jack-O’-Lantern with an elegant backflip. He cocked his head and pointed at the confused Shadow with raised eyebrows and a grin, mouthing the words  _ “You planning to join in?” _

Fire nearly singed his mask as a well-aimed Agi burned the Jack-O’-Lantern’s hat. Panther smiled back at his incredulous expression innocently, shrugging in apology.  _ That was so on purpose. _

Thunder rumbled overhead as Skull quickly came in to strike the poor Shadow with a Zio, electricity running through the whole floor and sending jolts up Joker’s spine. 

Definitely on purpose.

Finally, Mona jumped in to finish off the Jack-O’-Lantern with a clean Garu as it disintegrated with a distorted cry. Joker shut off the stereo calmly, hooking it under his arm with nothing short of a poker face. The only indication giving it away was the glint of amusement dancing in his eyes.

“What the  _ hell _ was that, dude.”

Akira struggled to keep his poker face intact. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.” Ryuji threw his hands up into the air as electricity crackled. “The music, dude! What’s with that?”

Ann laughed cheerfully as she adjusted her pigtails, eyes sparkling. “It was fun! Added a little more pizzazz to the fight, y’know?” Akira pointed at her disbelievingly. “You almost burned my face off!”

“And you blew my eardrums! All’s fair in love and war,” she replied with a grin. Morgana nodded approvingly. “Lady Ann’s right. The music was a nice touch to the fight, although it was a bit loud.”

“It’s not my last surprise,” Akira said.

_ Thwack. _

“Ow.”

Ryuji crossed his arms and scowled, though Akira could tell he wasn’t really mad. “Just don’t turn it up so loud next time, okay? It almost made my ears bleed!”

Morgana snorted. “Your shouting always makes our ears bleed, so I don’t know why you’re complaining, Skull.”

“Can it, cat.”

 

-

-

-

 

_ “I’m done in~! By the time it’s hit you, your last surprise… oooh, oooh, oooh…” _ the sweet voice crooned as Joker sheathed his dagger and pulled on his glove, letting the two Shadows explode into nothingness behind him. 

Mona came up with the stereo and gave him a high-five-- er, paw. “That was awesome, Joker!” he told him enthusiastically.

Fox gave them a solemn nod. “Indeed. The gracefulness and execution of your final attack was splendid, as was your stunning teamwork with Skull. Most impressive.” He paused to look him. “I now understand what you mean by your needing the stereo. It made the experience of engaging against Shadows much more pleasurable.”

Panther nodded, her cerulean eyes bright. “Right, right? It just adds this… I dunno… stylishness to it! It totally fits our team, don’tcha think?” Mona snorted. “Our team minus one, maybe.”

“Why the hell are you lookin’ at me for?”

“Although,” Fox mused, gloved hand stroking his chin like he usually did while imagining his next art piece. “If we were to assign a musical piece for every member of the team, I’d love mine to be a classic… perhaps Chopin, or Beethoven… A rock piece would surely fit Skull’s brash nature well, while a calming pop song would suit Panther’s gentle yet ferocious nature…”

_ “Calming pop?” _

“Let him ramble. It’s not like you can stop him anyway.”

 

-

-

-

 

Queen thought the Phantom Thieves were, in short of a better word, lackluster.

They moved as one unit, true, but a jumbled one; Skull’s panicked cries pierced through Ann’s shivers over the ice attack she poorly received, and Yusuke was battering the same Shadow over and over again with a mighty rage that seemed to appear out of nowhere. And Joker…

Joker was probably the only thing keeping the Phantom Thieves from completely falling apart.

He cleanly struck each Shadow down with their weaknesses and shot or slashed them to death; Queen watched with awe as he finished off the last Shadow easily. 

“Lookin’ cool, Joker!” Morgana cheered, but even he seemed a bit down. Makoto glanced at him, mask disappearing in a flash to summon Johanna. 

She hastily cast a Diarama on Ann, who was still shaking from her brief frozen spell. 

“Are… you guys okay?” she murmured worriedly, and Joker waved a hand. “We broke our stereo. Sent it to Tanaka’s to get it fixed, it’ll be here by tomorrow.”

“...Stereo? Tanaka’s?”

Morgana swished his tail. “We usually have a stereo to put on when we fight Shadows. We can’t fight like we usually do without it.” Makoto’s frown only deepened. “I thought you couldn’t bring electronic devices into the Metaverse?”

“It’s true. Anything run by electricity or batteries don’t work at all in the Metaverse,” Akira said, waving a usual hand. “But the website we bought the stereo from makes all kinds of stuff that shouldn’t work in the Metaverse, but does.”

“Do you know if the website’s dangerous?”

“It’s called Tanaka’s Shady Commodities. I’m pretty sure it’s very dangerous.” But Akira gave her a tired smile, eyes on the groaning group. “It’s worth it, though. The music relaxes us and helps us communicate.”

Makoto nodded thoughtfully. “I see. How much does one cost?”

“A new one? Twenty five hundred thousand yen.”

Her jaw dropped. “I’m sorry, what?” Akira let out a laugh after seeing her surprised face. “You heard me right. Twenty five hundred thousand yen for one stereo. It doesn’t come cheap.” He scratched his chin. “But I buy a whole bunch of stuff for the Thieves on TSC, so they gave me a discount. I’m only paying a hundred fifty thousand yen for it to get fixed.”

“That’s still a ridiculous amount of money.”

“We make plenty just grinding in the Metaverse, so it really isn’t much of a loss. The stereo is one of our most prized members, after all.”

Ryuji jumped as a guard started coming around the corner. “Joker, there’s a Shadow there!”

Joker nodded, pushing back his coattails with a flourish. “Queen, how would you like to be in the main party for a bit? We’ll see what you need work on.”

“I’d love to.”

It was only after the Shadow was defeated did Makoto realize Joker had been humming a tune under his breath the entire time he was fighting.

 

-

-

-

 

“Your taste in music sucks, Akira.”

Akira couldn’t take his eyes off the roads of Mementos, but the ends of his lips quirked up to give the orange-haired girl sitting next to him a small grin. “Oh? What’s so wrong about it?”

“It’s totally just a game OST! Like, a typical JRPG one! Seriously, it’s  _ so _ bland,” Futaba huffed, crossing her thin arms. “Honestly, sometimes I think you’re just a game protagonist. One where everyone fights over your personality and your name. The only defining feature you’d have about yourself is your terrible taste in music.”

“Ouch. You’re hurting me lots, Futaba.”

“It’s Oracle to you.” She gave him a tiny smile, letting him know she was only messing with him. “How do you even call ‘Last Surprise’ battle music? It’s so cheesy!”

“Do you have any suggestions, then?” Akira chuckled, his gloved hands drumming the steering wheel. Futaba seemed to think about it. “Hmmm… ever heard ‘Mass Destruction’? It’s super battle-y.”

Akira let out a laugh. “That sounds too literal, don’t you think?” Her giant, frog-like goggles wiggled as she shook her head. “Nuh-uh! Look, the lyrics are super cool, too.  _ Oh yeah, dada-dada, dada-dada…” _

“Those aren’t lyrics, though,” said Yusuke, who was listening from the back. Futaba turned around and stuck out her tongue. “Shush, I bet your taste in music’s in something gross. Like classical.”

“She’s not wrong.”

 

-

-

-

 

Noir cleaved her axe into the poor Shadow’s head, the swing coinciding perfectly with the last few notes of the trumpet playing in the background. 

Joker gave her a thumbs-up as the Shadow’s robotic cry fizzled into nothingness. “Didn’t even need to tell you what to do and you still kicked ass. Why couldn’t we have you join us sooner?”

She giggled as she clipped the axe to her belt behind her. “Thank you very much, Joker-san.”

“Just Joker.”

“Right.”

She paused to look at the stereo, which Skull was picking up carefully (Akira had very firmly told all of them that if the stereo were to break for the  _ fourth _ time, he’d take it out of their weaponry checks). “I must say, adding the music to our battles is a very nice touch. Perhaps I’ll do it when I go to my martial arts classes.”

“You do martial arts?”

“And I work out.”

Queen bumped his shoulder. “She’s carrying an axe behind her back without breaking a sweat. There’s no way she  _ doesn’t _ work out.”

Noir let out a tinkle of a laugh. “Really, I don’t do much. It’s only for self-defense, after all.”

_ Self-defense… _ like that one time she judo-flipped a Shadow into a pile of black sand.

Joker and Queen gulped.

Noir continued smiling serenely.

 

-

-

-

 

Crow was, for the first time ever, at a loss for words.

Joker had put him on the main party (of course he would, Crow was far more skilled than any of the other Thieves), but he had no idea what to do. Throughout the two-three years he had spent alone in the Metaverse, he never had to work with a team.

Never had to work with such a  _ rambunctious  _ one, either.

Noir dropped in, shooting a Mapsio spell to the Shadows before her. To follow up, Queen came up right behind her, summoning Anat and blowing up the remaining enemies with radioactive energy. Skull rushed in and smacked the last one with uis bat, the atmosphere charged with electricity. Power hummed in the air, but it felt… friendly. Not chilling. Not lonely.

He vaguely wondered if it was the music making him feel these alien feelings. The soft yet upbeat jazz filled everyone’s ears as they wordlessly worked to rid the Shadows with not a single, powerful blow as he was used to doing, but with  _ teamwork.  _

He felt lost.

Akechi had been working under  _ that bastard _ for far too long, he supposed. He knew that warm feelings weren’t supposed to feel so distant or new. But…

He blinked when he realized the music didn’t shut off. Joker smiled at him crookedly, his obelisk eyes boring into his maroon ones as if he knew all the secrets of the world. Akechi didn’t even realize he was holding his breath under the gaze of the leader of the Phantom Thieves of Hearts.

He spoke quietly. “You’re a part of us now. Don’t hold back, Crow.”

Akechi swallowed. Joker smiled knowingly, their faces only inches apart.

Then the music changed.

_ “We’re all~ in this~ together~,” _ the rest of the Thieves sang; Akechi could even hear the snappy Morgana’s thin, child-like voice singing along with them. He turned around and groaned.

But when he heard Ryuji attempting to falsetto  and squawked like a parrot instead, he couldn’t help but laugh.

Maybe he’d let this feeling last for a little longer.

 

-

 

**Author's Note:**

> I ended it on a kind of fluffy note? I could’ve just made it purely crack but I’m also a sucker for sweet endings so here we are hahah


End file.
